Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Hot Gossip Celeb

Paris Hilton Isn't Hungry

Officials at the Lynwood jail have threatened to put Paris on a feeding tube if she continues to refuse to eat. Paris, 25, who was listed at 110 pounds when she entered jail, now reportedly weighs 100 pounds.

After she was transferred back, Paris refused to eat. Staff became worried as she seems very thin with her bones poking out. She was also very weak and lethargic. They threatened to put her on an intravenous drip to rehydrate her and give her some nourishment unless she started eating. She has since managed to get a little food down, but doctors are closely monitoring her."

It's times like these when I wished I worked in that jail. I'd take Paris her food, hold it through the bars, then snatch it back real fast when she tried to reach for it. I'd do that for a while then I'd do the thing where I pretend I'm about to drop it, then laugh and tell the guards she refused to eat. Then I'd put in her feeding tube and fill her with warm nutritious goodness. Like battery acid.

Nicky and Kathy Hilton worrying and holding a vigil at the Free Paris rally. Oh wait, no, I mean "out shopping".

Paris Hilton is Released From Jail Again

I couldn't sleep tonight and now I know why. My body wanted to keep me awake so I could receive this really good news from TMZ:
After 23 days in jail, Paris Hilton is finally a free woman.

The heiress was released from prison shortly after midnight on Tuesday. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ that Paris has lost nearly 10 pounds during her stay and that on her way out of jail, she stopped to change clothes in a public restroom that "smells rancid."

Sources also tell TMZ that Lynwood jail is happy to see Paris go and they hope that now things can get back to normal. Don't we all.

Story developing ..."

Why do people always refer to the Retarded Ostrich as "the heiress?" Why not "the herpes spreader" or "cum crusted saggy eyelid-girl" or "puke?" those descriptions seem to make more sense, and you don't need to bother with that pesky "i before e, except after c" rule.

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